Blog
Welcome to my blog, where I share reflections on involuntary childlessness, identity, and the many ways we find meaning beyond motherhood. Here, I write openly about women’s wellbeing, inclusion, and the realities of living a life that doesn’t follow the expected path. My aim is to start honest conversations, challenge assumptions, and offer connection for anyone navigating life without children — by choice or by circumstance.
When your friends are having babies and you are not
I came across tis article recently by Kat Lister and found it very thought provoking. The author wrote about her experience of a friendship that survival and strengthened when her friend became pregnant whilst she was facing her infertility....
The school reunion
I went to a school reunion last night. It was great to catch up with people who I haven't seen since leaving school in 1987. As excited as I was to go I also found myself anxiously worrying about being asked if I had children. It would be natural for the others to ask...
Unfulfilled dreams
One aspect of my grief that I have found difficult to deal with is that I will not be giving my parents the grandchildren that they dreamed of. For as long as I can remember my dad had been asking me when was I going to get married and have children. At that time I...
Christmas Buttons
We were discussing the emotional triggers associated with the up and coming holiday session, at a Gateway Women plan B session, yes the perfect storm for childless women. Thinking about the pending family gathering reminded me of a time, not too long ago, that I had...
Pregnant Friends…
A very special friend who is instrumental in helping me through my grief sent me a message regarding one of my recent blogs... 'Hiding my pain in their joy' regarding a friend who has recently announced that she is pregnant. My friend wrote... In the ideal world:...
One step closer to my plan B
After receiving the exciting news that I will be photographing Terry McMillan early next year as Women Talk's official event photographer I was also honoured to be told that Women Talk are going to back my book and would like to get the book published to be launched...
Hiding my pain in their joy…
A friend of mine who has been on her own journey to becoming a mother told me recently that she is pregnant and I was unable to identify with how I felt. I found it difficult to move past the words "I am pregnant". I have been on this journey with her listening to her...
Gifts of Grief
Jody Day shared this poem with our GW group which I thought I'd share with you as the words and sentiment touched my heart. Whilst working through my grief I am learning to come to terms with my past decisions. I am slowly accepting the loss of not having my own...
Why does society always have to fix us???
I saw on the news recently that a woman in Sweden has become the first in the world to have a baby after having a womb transplant - and now doctors have been granted approval to carry out the UK’s first womb transplants. When I first heard this, I wasn’t even sure...
How do you stop the war???
My day ended on a note of grief. I struggled to contain my emotions when managing the "pregnant princess" at work. We have hit a new level in this battle that is quickly becoming a war of wits, trying to see who will come out the victor. Why does it have to be this...
A precious pregnant pause…
One of the things I find difficult in my grief about my childlessness (as an individual and a manager) is being around "precious pregnant women". You know the type, the ones who think that they shouldn’t have to do anything because they are pregnant… but pregnancy is...
My beginning …
I remember sitting in the office of my fertility consultant after having a number of fertility tests and wondering why he was telling me that he could not find a reason for me not being able to conceive. Unexplained infertility, he said. Hearing it left me feeling so...